 Opportunities. Temptations. Call them what you will, but they are there. Opportunities to take our lives as we know them, and throw a grenade on them. I love my life. I love my husband, my daughter, our small apartment, our crazy ministry life. While I type this, I hear Matt singing to Winnie who is inconsolable because of first teeth coming in. His voice is soothing even to me. Minutes ago, I was folding tiny onesies, tiny jeggings, and tiny T-shirts with hearts all over them. But I am strangely aware in this moment that I could throw it all away. We all could. Even though we know that it would be a cheap imitation of what we have. It is a beautiful life. It is a life of sitting and playing Noah. It is a life of getting too frustrated over losing a game of Ticket to Ride or Munchkin. It is a life of making and burning cookies…and then remaking and under-baking them just the way he likes. It is a life of load after load after load of laundry. It is a life of giggles with tummy raspberries. It is a life of linking hands in prayer. But there are opportunities…temptations…that with one click, with one text, or one “yes,” we could throw it all away. The power we have to destroy our lives in an instant takes my breath away. No one might know initially. The guilty joy might bring smiles at first. Elation, even. But then, but then… “[Y]ou can be sure that your sin will track you down.” No more tiny onesies. No more cooking that favorite meal for the 20,000th time. No more sighing as you put the toilet paper roll on the actual roller for the 30,000th time. We would miss it. We would recall the mundane as magical.
It’s not worth it. Thank God that the temptation is not the sin. The follow-through is. When I was deeply depressed several years ago, I had to post this verse in yet another small apartment to remind me not to give up. Not to give in to the temptation of literally and permanently leaving it all. "So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up." If we don’t give up. Don’t give up today. Temporary (or permanent) relief of the pain in our hearts won’t be worth it. Keep on fighting. Keep on moving. Keep doing that laundry. Keep training those kids. Keep preaching to that boss with your good attitude. Keep showing those friends Jesus’ love. Keep on drinking in God’s real love. Keep on exchanging your strength for his. Whether or not we see it, we are in a battle for our lives—our kids’ lives, our co-workers’ lives—and we will reap a harvest of blessing if we do not give up.
8 Comments
Sue
3/3/2015 01:06:34 am
Thank you. Just the rousing encouragement I needed. Blessings to you! Strength. Peace. Hope. Perseverance in the name of Jesus❤️
Laurie Krieg
3/3/2015 02:50:56 am
Amen, and you are welcome. Good Word.
Renee
3/3/2015 01:08:55 am
Such a beautiful way encourage us to say yes to Jesus today. Thanks so much.
Laurie Krieg
3/3/2015 02:51:47 am
Thanks for reading, Renee. And you are welcome, sister.
Gayle
3/3/2015 04:10:23 am
You are such a blessing to post this at a time to be such an encouragement.
Laurie Krieg
3/3/2015 05:16:45 am
So glad, Gayle. 😊
Jess
3/4/2015 03:21:10 am
I am so thankful God had you write that. I need to print it off and keep it near. I hate that tendency to want to throw it all away. I just want to scream..Why!?It is a very real thing that we need to be vigilant over always. I'm in a good place right now but it terrifies me that the possibility is there. Thank God that he is stronger than we are and He is our strength.
Laurie Krieg
3/4/2015 03:50:19 am
Yes, he is stronger! Your comment will be posted after it is approved.
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//About the Author
Laurie Krieg is broken, beloved, and gospel-addicted. Read more about her here.
//Recent PostsEpisode 34: How We Heal
4.23.18 How has the Krieg marriage been healing this last year? It's a real-life update. Episode 33: Sexual Discipleship 4.13.18 We are all sexually discipled. The question is not "if we are" but 'by whom'? Let's talk about how we, the Church, can sexually disciple better. Episode 32: Guiding Families 4.8.18 How can parents and leaders of LGBT+ people love them like Jesus? Guest: Bill Henson Are We in Love with Our Baristas? 4.3.18 What's the heart of attraction toward someone? Episode 31: How to Talk with the Kids 3.30.18 We have to talk with our kids about sex and sexuality, but how do we do it biblically? Guest: Branson Parler Episode 30: Women Struggle with Lust, Too 3.23.18 They do. (We do.) Quite a bit. Why are we so under-resourced and under-discussed? Guest: Amy Riordan Episode 29: It Takes a Village 3.18.18 How can youth pastors walk alongside LGBT+ youth well? Guest: Ray Low Changing Theology, Not Orientation 3.16.18 One student's journey with her faith and sexuality Guest: Katie Melone Focus on Which Family? 3.7.18 How can we relate as a biblical family--single or married? Guest: Dr. Branson Parler Podcast Episode 27: What's Really Best for the Kids? 3.2.18 How can we disciple our kids without hurting their hearts? Podcast Episode 26: Marriage: What Is It Good For? 2.23.18 The team draws timely connections between marriage, singleness, LGBT+ people, and the Church. Guest: Branson Parler The Day I Became Wonder Woman 2.23.18 Can God heal painful memories? Yeah. Podcast Episode 25: Friends in Low Places 2.16.18 How can you be a helpful friend to someone in pain? How can you be a helpful person in pain to your friends? Let's talk about it. Guest: Tammy Perlmutter The Three Spiritual Identities 2.11.18 Performance? Grace? Or Love? Where do you live? Podcast Episode 24: Is There Hope for Us? 2.7.18 On our nine-year anniversary, we ask that question. Podcast Episode 23: Don't Waste Your Marriage 2.2.18 How can we not waste it? Get on mission. The Secret Rooms of Our Hearts 1.23.18 How can we connect our hearts in the midst of processing trauma? Podcast Episode 22: Learn to Fight Well 1.19.18 Hint: Fighting well is not about fighting well, but about looking like Jesus. Chronic Soul Pain 1.19.18 Do you suffer from chronic pain of the soul? We all do. Let's stop pretending we don't--in community. Podcast Episode 21: Pursue the Perfect Marriage 1.13.18 What does perfection in marriage look like? Podcast Episode 20: Marriage Is Not That Great 1.6.17 Is there a different set of rules for marriages like ours? What Do You Want? 12.31.17 Laurie was due for a spiritual and marital audit, and she found herself before a holy God. Podcast Episode 19: I'm Coming Out 12.22.17 What was it like to come out to a friend for the first time? Laurie and that friend talk about it. Podcast Episode 18: The Loneliness of Leadership 12.15.17 Is loneliness a "required course" for leadership as Elisabeth Elliot said? Let's talk about it. Times They are Changin' 12.15.17 Matt is moving on to other things--but he's still here. (We explain.) Podcast Episode 17: The James Progression 12.7.17 How about we talk about a shame-free version of avoiding temptation? Podcast Episode 16: Concern and Hope for the Church 12.1.17 What is a gift we can receive in the midst of all the polarity we see today? Guest: Dr. Matthew Tuininga Podcast Episode 15: The New Health and Wealth Gospel 11.16.17 Does God want us to be happy? Guest: Gregory Coles Podcast Episode 14: Idolatry of Sex 11.11.17 How can we, the Church, look more like the Church? We need to look at what we worship. Podcast Episode 13: Marriage Matters 11.3.17 How can we cultivate intimacy in the tough seasons? Podcast Episode 12: Heart to Heart Prayer with Carolyn 10.27.17 Hear the heart of Laurie's longtime counselor, mentor, and friend. Chicken Love {A Guest Post From My Sister} 10.26.17 Like chickens, we can peck at each other, but we often just peck at ourselves. Podcast Episode 11: Forgiveness Is the Worst Best, Too 10.21.17 How do we truly forgive someone...in real life? Podcast Episode 10: Lament Is the Worst Best 10.13.17 Why do we got to feel the sad stuff of life? Against you, and you alone 10.11.17 We need something more convicting than the pain of a person. Podcast Episode 9: Pillar Practices 10.6.17 Pastor Marvin Williams joins us to share what keeps him tethered to Christ. Podcast Episode 8: Pillar People 9.29.17 Pastor David Beelen shares the critical people and practices in his life that have and do shape him to look and sound more like Jesus. Podcast Episode 7: Holy Hate? 9.21.17 Is there a time for Holy Hatred? Why I can't hate people anymore 9.5.17 Looking into her enemies' hearts won't let Laurie hate them anymore. Our friend, Greg Coles, on suffering well 8.25.17 Greg is leading worship at Caring Well. Here are some stellar pages from his book. Why I am so excited 8.21.17 The Caring Well conference is coming. I'm stoked. Here's why. So long, Shame 8.11.17 Shame snuck up on Laurie again. Three guest posts for Lies Young Women Believe 7.7.17 To the Girl Wrestling with her Sexuality, Who is Safe to Tell?, What do to with Painful Rejection Orlando reflections 6.27.17 Matt was finally able to name why he loved being with LGBT+/SSA Christians. Why Christians can care about LGBT+ people 5.22.17 Because...Jesus. What the world (my world) needs now is little, honest laments 5.9.17 We got to get the pain out. How can we really love people? 3.29.17 It takes experiencing love. Pillar People 3.22.17 Who are the critical characters in our lives? What I've learned after eight years in my mixed-orientation marriage 2.6.17 Are we really so different from other marriages? Addiction, worry, and worship are interchangeable 1.18.17 We are made for addiction. 5 reasons I'm glad I said "see ya" to my smartphone 12.29.16 It was keeping Laurie from feeling. That's not okay for someone in "the biz" of healing. My regift to you 12.21.16 Angela, Laurie's sister, shares hard three memories re-written. Two days after... 11.20.16 Perhaps there is something (someONE) who can unify us all. Now is the time to live like Jesus 11.11.16 This is why I cried about the election, and this is what I believe we can do next. A response to Jen 10.31.16 Rarely, do we get involved in disagreements with fellow Christians about the LGBTQ+ conversation. But, we had to share. There has to be a better way 9.30.16 How should we treat same-sex attracted Christians in the church? How vulnerability heals 9.6.16 Sometimes, doing the thing we want to do the least is the thing that will heal us the most. Inviting Jesus into anxiety 8.26.16 Fear has felt out-of-control after having a baby; inviting Jesus into it (even if he doesn't fix it) helps A new identity 8.11.16 Matt writes about a friend's affairs before and after coming to Christ--and how his identity was affected. Guest Post: Can't I just trust him, already? 7.22.16 Another guest writer reflects honestly on how her lack of trust leads her to fantasy. Guest Post: A reflection on "Living with Longing" 7.14.16 A guest writer reflects on how she practically makes it through the temptation to run from God instead of to him. Living with longing 7.5.16 Sometimes, you just have to endure. A response to Orlando: Don't stop caring 6.16.16. Let's not redraw the lines in the sand. We men need friends, too 6.7.16 Matt talks through how he didn't need a romantic interaction. He needed friendship. No shadow of shame 5.23.16 Laurie again faces the shame she fights. (Also, a word about the "T" in LGBTQ) One year ago... 5.4.16 Laurie reflects on the journey of Matt's pornography addiction recovery over the last year. 10 ways to make your church safer 4.19.16 Hint: It starts with the individual. We apologize for the delay 4.13.16 We are going to take a blogging break as we move our home and office. The benefits of opening locked memories 3.31.16 There are certain memories that seem off limits. But is it worth it to keep them locked up forever? Know self, know God (and vice-versa) 3.15.16 We share an excerpt from The Gift of Being Yourself regarding the relationship between self-knowledge and God-knowledge. I want my daughter to grow up bored 3.10.16 Boredom is...boring. But the neurological and spiritual costs of constant entertainment can be devastating. Not an identity 3.1.16 Laurie guest writes for Cornerstone University about how her struggle is often viewed differently from Matt's. Guest Post: How God saved me and my marriage 2.23.16 A guest writer explains how God rescued her from a life of death. When I am tempted to unforgive 2. 9.16 Laurie describes what she does when she wants to take back her "right" to pay Matt back. The slow descent 1.26.16 Matt compares pornography addiction to hiking down the Grand Canyon. I'd rather not self-reflect, thank you 1.19.16 Matt sampled single fatherhood for a week, and wrestled with avoiding internal reflection in the midst of busyness and boredom. Word for the year (and how it might look) 1.5.16 Laurie doesn't do resolutions anymore. (Too much opportunity for shame.) This year her word is "abide." Don't let me wallow 12.29.15 Is a life with same-sex attractions a doomed life? Don't give up 12.15.15 For all the chronic pain sufferers... //Go to archives |
